The deed
29. Spread mental health awareness.
Today I’m going to share one other person’s story. Once again, this is not my story, I am sharing someone else’s (with their permission, of course).
I’ll also provide links for mental health organizations and professionals in St. Louis if you want to seek help for yourself or a loved one.
Because it’s ok to talk about it. It’s ok to own it, as long as it doesn’t own you.
Anonymous:
“I think it’s important for everyone to recognize the signs of depression, and be aware of how to aid those who are. It could just help to save someone who doesn’t even know they are depressed. I personally went through a situation of that sort.
Years ago, I was going through a tough time. I had never really been an emotional person, or had taken down my walls enough to let anyone in. Once I finally did, I fell hard and got hurt. I was devastated, and afterwards it seemed like the troubles kept coming my way, in all aspects of life. When it rains, it pours..right? I had always been a strong person, but after finally taking my guard down and getting hurt in return, something changed in me. I broke.
I couldn’t seem to handle the new feelings of heartbreak. I had never been through anything of the sort before, therefore wasn’t experienced in the healing process. I felt like I lost myself completely. I didn’t know how to be independent and strong like I once was. I either wasn’t sleeping at all, or slept all of the time, wasn’t eating, wasn’t getting out into the world to see anyone or have any fun, and I cried..a lot. I worked because I had to, but was extremely hesitant in doing so. This wasn’t me. I felt as though I was just in a “funk”.
Luckily, I had a very loving, caring, concerned mother who recognized my odd behavior. She questioned if I was depressed and was persistent in trying to get to the bottom of things. It was a constant battle as I insisted I wasn’t depressed.
Truthfully, I didn’t believe in depression. I told myself that everyone goes through tough times, and I was just going to be sad for a little while and I’d be fine soon enough. I was unable to recognize how unhealthy I was, how much weight I had lost, and how my continued sad demeanor was affecting my life and those around me.
My persistent mother finally dragged me to the doctor one day, and basically explained everything for me, as I was too stubborn to do so myself. I kept saying I was fine and didn’t need to be there. The doctor then explained to me that sometimes when you go through something like that, it can be more traumatic than you think, and cause a chemical imbalance in your brain, causing you to be unable to control your emotions. Your serotonin levels decrease tremendously all at once, and make it incredibly difficult to allow your emotions and nervous system to function correctly. I heard everything he was saying, but didn’t process any of it until much later.
He prescribed a low dose Prozac for me, which I was also a huge disbeliever in. My account of everything afterwards was this: the gradual use of the Prozac was able to increase my energy enough to actually get up and be aware of my surroundings, and increasingly helped me to focus on other things rather than just sulking. Eventually, I regained my appetite, sleep patterns improved, and I began working out regularly again. I knew of the benefits of endorphins being released by exercise, but I had only then been self aware enough to WANT those endorphins and to help myself.
From there, everything continued to get better. I finally felt and looked better, and had the motivation I needed to do better at work and to be a happier person that other people would actually want to be around. This created a snowball affect and allowed so many more good things to happen to me, and to increase my own happiness and self worth. Honestly, I wasn’t great at keeping up with the Prozac, as I still had/have my own concerns about it, but I do think it was a helpful first step to getting my energy back enough to do all of these things. I knew, however, that it was something I didn’t want to always rely on, so I made sure to safely take myself off of it when the time was right, with the doc’s guidance of course.
With that said, I have to credit most of my improvement to my support system. Thanks to my mother, and other loved ones, I was able to get my life back on track. No matter how stubborn or in denial I was, their persistence gave me the help I desperately needed. Having people around me that knew what depression looked like, and that wanted to do everything they could to end it, truly helped me.
Throughout the years following that experience, I went through several other, way more horrible events. However, I was able to recall how I dealt with things before, and everything I had to do to get back to normal. I knew I didn’t want to go through all that again and made sure not to allow myself to get to that point. I was able to recognize how often these things happen in life, and that your own life can’t stop because of it.
I never want to be the way I was back then, and with that experience, I know exactly what to do to make sure that that doesn’t happen. But, not everyone is able to recognize and are able to keep themselves from getting to that point. THIS is why it is so important for any and everyone to be aware. Whether you are going through it yourself, or come across someone else who is, it is important to know how serious of an issue it is. If ignored, it will continue to increasingly get worse, until it may be too late. Knowing the signs, and what you can do to help, just might save someone.”
Resources:
Find some help in the St. Louis area: http://www.startherestl.org/mental-health.html
libbylbishop 